Am I Weird or Is This Normal? Advice and Information to Get Teens in the Know

Chapter 1: Getting It On How do I meet someone to date?How do I get someone to go out with me?What should we do when we're out together? None of us know intuitively how to tell if someone is interested, or how to deal with the possible rejection, or what to say on a date. These things are learned through trial and error.Potentially embarrassing? Yes. Because part of the thrill of going out with someone is feeling accepted. It's like winning a People's Choice Award. You feel like jumping up and saying, "He likes me. He really, really likes me!"But the risks of dating -- or trying to get a boyfriend -- are much lower if you approach dating not from the attitude of "How can I get someone to go out with me?" but "What do I want from this?" Never thought of it that way, did you?This chapter will give you a handle on how to work out the balance between boys and your life without losing your mind. Crushes Crushes are bittersweet. They can make your day tolerable.But one-sided yearning can also be painful. The object of your passion may never give you the time of day. Which is why, ultimately, this state of being is called a crush (as indemolish),not a boost.I have a crush on this guy at school,and he's all I can think about.DR.MARLIN: When you have a crush, you think you're in love but you're not. Okay, so you can't stop thinking about the guy and your heart beats a mile a minute when he's near.But this passion is based on fantasy. After all, what do you really know about this guy other than that he looks good?Sometimes this sort of fantasy love is much better than the real thing: He's perfect. It's fun to indulge. It's easy to read love signals into his every move. It can even be a confidence booster because you convince yourself he's drooling over you when he really has no interest in you.Decide if you'd rather stick with the fantasy or if this is something you want to try to make happen. Not all crushes are worth acting on, especially if the person is someone off-limits like your best friend's boyfriend.Here's how to decide: Do a reality check on your crush, in which you find out at least five true things about him.Are these qualities you would want in a boyfriend? For instance, if you find out that he dumped his last girlfriend over the phone or that he's always goofing off in class, he may not be right for you.If it turns out that you are still interested in him, you might want to go for it -- gently. If you did your reality-check homework, you have some idea what he's interested in and if it interests you, too. Act on that. Talk to him about whatever you have in common.LAURA: It's not easy to just approach some guy who you really like, let alone talk to him. You have to connive the situation a little by putting yourself in his path. I really liked this guy who was in another grade, so there was hardly any opportunity for us to connect. Then I found out he was taking an architecture class that I'd been planning to take the following year. So I signed up right away.Okay, we didn't end up going out. But we did become great friends, which can be another bonus of crushing on a guy.There are lots of not-so-obvious opportunities to get near him. Hang out at a friend's locker near his, go to the candy store where he goes, or try to get next to him on the lunch line. Eventually make eye contact and say something. If there's the slightest chance he's interested, he'll start talking, even if it's just a grunt. If he's picking up your signals and doesn't send one back, then take the hint and move on. Getting a Date In poll after poll, guys say the same thing: They hate fake. In other words, wanting to be in a relationship so desperately that you act in a way that's not you is the number one turnoff. The only thing you can do to make yourself sizzlePotash, Marlin S. is the author of 'Am I Weird or Is This Normal? Advice and Information to Get Teens in the Know' with ISBN 9780743210874 and ISBN 0743210875.